Existence

Endless thoughts chasing each other
As I lay awake till morning.

There's this lump in my throat
Threatening unseasonal rains.

The mind is tired
The heart is numb.

Waves from a sea of memories
Crashing against a beaten coast of life.

I bask in the sun
Looking happy and content.

Within old lanes of the mind's village
It's a calm, with the threat of a storm.

I stand tall
Proud and tough.

Within the delicate world of the heart
Desolation and sorrow run amok.

How natural it is to laugh it all off
How difficult it is to hide it all.

The shell survived
The substance within vaporised.

Yes, it looks like there is no looking back now
Looking back, I realise I can't see ahead anymore.

Worldly goods are fixed and planned
Spirit is dying a slow death

Existence.
This is how it eventually shaped up.

Existence.
Outward face to smile
And inner darkness to hide the misery.